a tidbit

Why did this pop into my head today? - "cotton candy sweet as gold, let me see that tootsie rooooll....!" - well, why ever it did, it made my day. ... always good to remember bar/bat mitzvahs. 

You know here you don't wear shoes into the house.... so as I was wearing my friends slippers to go pee i looked down to notice "K.K.K." written in bold.... it made me kinda uncomfortable. 

grandmas cookın

Where İ am now:
- A totally Turkısh holıday haven on the Mediterranean.
- Thınkıng Amerıcan Apperal suıted me to feel just a bıt too skımpy ın my brıght red bıkını, wıth brıght red sunglasses just overdoıng ıt...
- By the sıde of the pool makıng defense mechanısms and the sılk of spıders a hands-on learnıng experıence for the lıttle ones - ı assume thıs ıs defınıtly not culturally approprıate...
- Sometımes wıshıng ı am amidst the incessant buzz of cıcadas, rather than the incessant buzz of power struggles.
- Seeıng strongly scratchıng, screamıng, spitting, and splahıng are four ss that ı simply cannot tolerate.
- Rememberıng why we had so many bırthday partıes at the Beach Waterpark. Waterslıdes are whats up.
- Apprecıatıng clımate control (ı.e.- AC)
- Fındıng solace ın sea stones...
- Feelıng ı am the only female ın thıs smokey fluorescent ınternet cafe. Creeped out by EVERY man around me who ıs 'chattıng' (wıth a lady ın a dımly lıt room, or sımılar ınternetcafe). serıously, who does that? no eye contact molly... no eye contact ....

bad blogger

my dear friends- my poppin posts (ha) have been sparse, but i have been feeling full. 

deciding to be proactive really can make all the difference. i have been putting the driver, and caffeine, to great use. - it is often hard work to find a legit friend. but i believe i found one very quickly...  suha and i took a minitrip, and ventured to the Aegean sea. i will let a belly full of wine and the Aeolians do the talking .... 

and next week i just learned i will take a short flight to the south (with maid and girls) and we will stay at grandmas holiday house. so ..... perhaps there will not be internet. but after this, shiiiiiit this blogspot is going to start poppin for reals. (without so many contacts i find ive got a lot, like a real lot, to say to anyone out there.....) until then ....

toilet talk

Warning to Mom and Dad: You may feel disgusted with your daughter after reading this...

Starting with the small stuff:

~Washing machines and dryers in other countries suck. 

~Also Mom and Dad, expect a package request soon. Turkey hasn't caught onto the whole green thing as America has yet. Organic tampons this way please.... 

~I thought my eyebrows were hopeless. Now after 11 years of eyebrow maintenance they have finally found their shape!

~Something is very satisfying about a great salon and a great cut, but it surely doesn't fit into the equation of saving money. Tonight, with the help of a tiny make-up mirror, the hair in the back of my head has suffered.... greatly. 

~Brooke/Casey where are you? By the time I realized a 6 year old was popping something on my back.... I was so excited I couldn't stop her. 

~Only the young, old and sick get bathed by someone's hands other than their own. (a love doesn't count...) It's so personal. Like kissing with your eyes open. But in Turkey, I rejoice to be sudsed up, soaped, scrubbed and scrubbed hard. I like to think of it as the smallest offering of peace between peoples. Go on, put the guns away, let a naked Jewish woman, naked Muslim woman and some PertPlus do the dirty work.... 

~And while it may fly for a love to bath you, it is never fly for them to wipe your ass. The young, old or sick are the only exceptions. Yesterday I wondered how many hundreds of times I have said, "DOWNWARD DOG" (indicatinggetonallfourswithyourlittlebehindintheair/myface)... 

~Sometimes connections are necessary for things to click. I explained to the girls that is it perfectly normal to have some hair "down there." In fact, every little boy and girl will have it when they grow up. Even teenagers have it! "Even Hannah Montana?!" "Yes honey, even Hannah Montana." I explained that every person can do as they please with it, and some choose to remove it. They took it a step further, and soon I found myself in a position I never would have imagined... Being consulted on the pubic hair status of 

Troy and Gabriella from High School Musical. "Well sweetie, you know, they grow it for sure, but I'm not really sure what they do with it..." - ummmm.... 

some thoughts.

I wrote these bits on the plane...when lack of sleep and sourness were still strong...

now though, I am back. And happy. And falling in love with this city...

Consumerist culture may be at the heart of America these days, but I believe it is at the heart of my hell. As I wonder when our track of priorities derailed, I admit I see the excitement state-of-the-art technology, mass money, and massive manpower can create. Do the children feel the crowds, frantic parents, illusion, lines, chaos and excess of skin as I do, or do they really feel Disneyland is "the happiest place on earth?"

The growth I am experiencing must be serious. Why else would I be compromising myself so? I thrive by traveling and living independently. Now I live a life where my days and seeming existence are mapped out by others. (I recognize the family must also make compromises to take me/others onboard.) I recognize I am getting paid to travel, live and eat well, intimately examine the insides of a family(&myroleinit), and save mad $$$. .... 

as I am paid to smile through my struggles I wonder how many have learned to smile through(accept) their days and suppress their struggles, assuming their outward actions/accomplishments take precedent over their ultimate happiness. Honor thyself.

I met a beetle beauty. I think I have only ever seem him on t-shirts and calenders, but today I made his acquaintance. I don't know his name, because it has been left in my field guides, which reside in Ohio.  I assumed him dead and assigned him my partner in crime as we listened to Cinderella tell her story(inavoicethatmakesyouwanttovomit). The girls' mother did not share my enthusiasm, and told me I should have been born a boy. I wanted to tell her this has nothing to do with gender, only an interest in the pure. Holding onto this connection to the past, I felt all the wonder of the world embodied in this little guys intricacies. Then as I peered into my hands I was surprised to see him briefly say hello, before his hind legs flicked into their final slumber. I slid him into my RayBan case, and knew he would coat my eyeglasses with some of his shimmer.

*The family entrusted many semi-important cards, papers, clothes, money to me...  and I was so proud to surprise myself and not lose any of them... but. of course. on the way to  the airport i left my camera in the taxi. - so you don't get to see Cinderella or the beetle...